March 19, 2013

Tales from the Grocery Store, Volume 5


I have never been able to figure out why cashiers and/or bagboys usually feel the need to make comments on your purchases while they're ringing you up.  "Were you able to find everything OK?"  *boop*  "Ooh, are these good?"  *boop*   "Well, this is nice"  *boop*   "Mmmm, that looks good"  *boop*   and "I'll need to get myself some of these while they're on sale"  *boop*  are just a handful of the examples I've heard in all my years of purchasing items.  I guess the cashiers/bagboys are just trying to make small talk to pass the time or something.  Or who knows, maybe it's some kind of weird requirement.  Like a dumb store policy.  You never know what kind of weirdo, cockamamie rules management are gonna throw out there to force their poor employees to comply with (as if they didn't have enough to worry about or mess with as it is).

It wouldn't do for me to be a cashier.  Step 1, I don't particularly like interacting with strangers (or most other humans, for that matter).  Step 2, I don't give a crap what kind of cookies you're buying this week, or if they're any good.  I would imagine if you're buying them, you must like them, and who cares what anybody else thinks.  I would never dream of making any kind of comment about somebody's little ol' cookies, or anything else.

Today's grocery store weirdness occurred at the checkout.  I had a box of borax in my buggy, and the older lady cashier said something about it (something to the effect of what a versatile product it was), and I agreed, and explained that I used it to make my own laundry detergent, among other things.  The cashier said "You're smart".  Then the bagboy piped up and said "I use it too" and both me and the cashier-lady looked at each other in slight bewilderment, because you wouldn't expect a 19+/- year old guy with an emo haircut to be using borax for anything (much less using any type of cleaning product at all, for that matter).  And that's when the dude shamelessly explained "I use it for killing roaches", and both me and the cashier lady were like
 
And the bagboy continued to explain how he sprinkles it all around behind everything, and how borax is the only thing he's found that would kill his roaches.

I mean, don't get me wrong.  I've seen enough episodes of Billy the Exterminator to know that these things can happen to even the cleanest of people (although I can't help but think that the nastier your house is, surely the more appealing it would be to a variety of vermin)...?

So even though I don't really like interacting with strange people, at the same time, I'm always nice to everyone, so I tried to smooth over the embarrassment of the situation (not for myself, but for the bagboy, who evidently didn't realize that having roaches in your house was something that you should probably be embarrassed about, or at the very least, a taboo fact that you might not want to freely advertise to the world) by simply stating over again how yes, indeed, borax certainly can be used for a wide variety of different things.  Even killing roaches.  *shudder*

Finally, my grocery transaction was complete, and as always, the bagboy asked me if I needed any help getting my groceries out to my car.  With visions of roaches skittering down his shirt sleeves and into my grocery bags to come home with me, I politely declined (although I always decline assistance anyway, roaches or no roaches).  And I made my way home with just a very slight case of the willies.

When I got home and was unloading the groceries and putting them away, I discovered that the roachy bagboy had neglected to put my carton of eggs in the buggy, so I didn't make it home with them.  And boy, was I pissed about it.  I hope Ol' Roachy enjoys his omelet tonight!  >:{

Stupid grocery store!  Grr!

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