Our Trip to Brasstown Bald Mountain -- the Highest Point in Georgia

Jamie's on vacation from work this week, so we have several really fun day-trips planned.

Today we went to Brasstown Bald Mountain, which is the highest point in Georgia, and just so happens to be conveniently located in our town.  I had been there twice in the past, but Jamie and Lilly had never been there before.  So we all loaded up and took Lilly's cousin Mia with us too (she'd never been there before either) for a day of fun.

It was gorgeous!  It really did make you feel like you were almost literally on top of the world.  And the air was just so good to breathe -- it's like it was so ultra-fresh and clean -- maybe because it must have been super-oxegynated from all those zillions and zillions of trees down below.  I couldn't get enough of it.  It was awesome!

Deana (Almost) Gets a Job :/

I wasn't really looking for a job.  But as I was driving myself, Jamie, and Lilly back home from yet another trip to the beach last Saturday, we passed by the road that the Humane Society is on, and their signage (which is positioned down beside the main highway) said "RECEPTIONIST NEEDED".

I was intrigued.  I thought that might be a fun job for me to do.  I love animals, and I know how to "recept" from my 16 years of working at a bank, so it seemed like the perfect fit for me.

So come Monday morning, I excitedly called the Humane Society to inquire about the position.  Their current receptionist answered the phone, and she talked a million miles an hour.  It was kind of hard for me to catch what she was saying, and I felt like she was just trying to get me off the phone as fast as she could.  I asked her if the position was on a volunteer basis, or if it was a paid position.  She told me that it was a part-time paid position, and that you would be required to work some Saturdays.  Then I asked her what the duties were, and she tersely told me "adoptions and answering the phones".  She told me that I could come fill out an application; I thanked her, and then we hung up.

As soon as I could get Lilly dragged out of the bed, we drove up there so I could fill out an application.  After I handed my application to the receptionist, me and Lilly took the time to pet all the cats and kittens, and check out all the dogs.  It was fun.  Before we left, I asked the receptionist if she happened to know when I might hear something back about the job, and she said she didn't know; but she knew that they were really looking at all of the applications carefully.  I thanked her, and me and Lilly left and went back home.

Just a little while after me and Lilly got back home, my phone rang, and much to my surprise, it was the Humane Society.  It was the Manager named Tim, and he asked me how fast I could come back up there to meet them so that they could "put a face with the name".  I told him I could be there within 30 minutes.  So me and Lilly got back in the car and drove all the way back up there.

When I got there, it was busy because an older couple was adopting a fat brown pug-looking dog, so I had to ditch Lilly in their little waiting area so I could follow Tim into the back.  We walked into a lady named Lisa's office (she is a Director, and married to Tim).  They explained that my neat handwriting on my application really caught their eye, and that when Tim had called me on the phone to come meet them, he could hear that I had a "good phone voice".  Then he went on to explain to me that usually (the way they'd done things before) was that their receptionist would work Monday through Saturday from 10:00 to 4:00.  But now, they were going to change that to having a receptionist work Monday through Thursday (a position which they would fill about 6 weeks from now), and a different receptionist working on Friday, Saturday, and Monday (which is a position that they would fill immediately).  I didn't realize until I got home later that it didn't make complete sense, because why would you need two receptionists on Monday?  So if he misspoke, I don't know what he really meant.  In the end, Tim told me that they would let me know something in a couple of weeks.  I thanked him and Lisa, retrieved Lilly from the waiting area, and we left.

The next afternoon, I got another phone call from Tim, and he told me that now they were "pushed", and really needed to get someone in there now.  So he asked me if I could come back yet again for a more formal interview, but that I would have to come back up there pretty quick, since they had another interview at 4:30.  Taken by surprise again, I told him sure, and that I could be there around 3:45.  I had to get myself ready in a whirlwind, and then I drove up there as fast as I could.

When I sat down for the "more formal" interview with Tim and Lisa, Tim asked me if I could come in a couple of Saturdays a month to get familiar with their protocol and learn their verbiage.  I said that would be fine.  Then he asked me to come in the very next day (which was a Thursday) at 10:00 AM for 2, 3, or 4 hours just to observe ("shadow") their current receptionist, Kelli, who is 4 months pregnant and will be going on maternity leave.  They wanted me to just observe her to kind of get a feel for what the job involved, and to see if I liked it.  Then Lisa piped up and said that if I took the job and wanted to get in more hours, I could come in at 8:00 AM instead of 10:00 AM to clean the cat room, and Tim piped up and sternly said that that would be just a "maybe" in the "distant long future".  I told them that would be fine; if they needed for me to clean the cat room, I would be more than willing to clean the cat room.  And Tim re-iterated that it was only a "MAYBE".  Then Lisa talked to me more about observing their current receptionist, Kelli.  Lisa basically told me not to pay too close attention to the way Kelli does things, because she doesn't do them the way that Lisa wants her to.  Then Lisa spent several minutes griping about the lack of organization at the receptionist desk, and that she could never find what she needed, and how all the receptionists do things a different way, and that she would show me how she wanted things done.  (OK, I got it -- don't pay any attention to Kelli because she evidently sucks).  :/  It was ironic that Lisa was emphasizing to me the importance of organization, since her own desk and office was a complete and utter pigsty with all kinds of papers stacked up haphazardly all over the place.  She had major trouble finding anything in her own office.  I jokingly asked Lisa if it was "organized chaos", and she replied with "no; just chaos".  Hmm.  Lisa also told me about how the women there tended to be gossipy and complain about each other to her all the time (no surprise there, if that was really true.  It seems to be that way in almost every job -- it's just the nature of many women).  I told her that I got along well with everyone, and that I didn't do things like that.

The next morning, I dropped Lilly off with Dad and Patti so that I could go to the Humane Society and "shadow" their current receptionist, Kelli.  The day went pretty good.  The strange thing was, I thought that Kelli (although not 100% perfect --but who is--) was nice and competent, the receptionist desk was organized perfectly fine, and that everything was neat, easy to find, and in reach.  And I'm personally a stickler for stuff like that, too.  Hmm.  Oh, well.

The day wore on, and my back, hips, and feet started hurting pretty bad, since there was no chair for me to sit in.  There was one stool at the receptionist desk, but even Kelli barely used it at all, and I wasn't about to ask if I could sit on it with her being 4 months pregnant.  What really sucked is that nobody bothered to tell me that you didn't get to leave the premises to take a lunch break.  I hadn't even had breakfast that morning; only a cup of coffee at home.  I had incorrectly assumed that I would be getting to leave that office to go out to lunch, and that I would be able to eat something then.  Ding-Dong, I Was Wrong.  I never got to eat or drink anything at all until I got home, way later that evening.  How pregnant Kelli does it, I'll never know.  I did notice her eating a few baby carrots at one point, late in the afternoon, however.  I didn't find out until the day was done that you are allowed to eat lunch at the receptionist desk, but only as long it's not "stinky".  Basically, since it's a part-time job, you have to work through your lunch.  OK, I guess I could handle that, now that I'm aware of it.  :/

Anyway, I got to witness the adoptions of 2 English Bulldogs that day, which was fun.  Kelli told me that Tim had told her that after the 2nd bulldog adoption was finished, I could be free to go on home for the day.  I was secretly excited to get to go home at that point since my back, hips, and feet were absolutely killing me by then, and I was starving so bad, my stomach was gnawing my backbone.  I gladly hopped in my car and started to head home, but I stopped at a gas station in town to get gas first because the gas light had come on in my car.  Just as I was starting to leave the gas station, my cell phone rang.  It was Tim.  He said that Kelli told him that I had already left, but he was wondering if I could come back up there and talk to them about how I had liked it that day.  I was secretly pissed about having to drag all the way back up there, because I was so physically exhausted and starving to death, but of course I told him I would be back there in just a few minutes.

When I got there and met with Tim and Lisa, they said that "out of all the 64,000 applications" they had received, that they had it narrowed down to "2 and a half people", and that I was one of them.  They asked me what I thought after observing Kelli all day, and I told them that I had enjoyed it.  Then Tim and Lisa began hem-hawwing around and going over a wall calendar, and talking about some girl named Amanda that they had never mentioned to me before.  They also told me that the other girl that they had it narrowed down to was named Tina, and they talked about how it was going to be so confusing to have a Deana and a Tina working there, since our names sound almost exactly alike.  After an eternity of Tim and Lisa going over that wall calendar and trying to figure out the scheduling of this mystery girl named Amanda, they finally came to the conclusion that this Saturday (and the following Saturday, too), me and Tina needed to come in and train with Amanda.  And yet again, Lisa mentioned to me not to even pay much attention to what Amanda would show us, because it's not exactly the way that Lisa wants for things to be done.  So I told Lisa OK, that I would take the training "with a big grain of salt".  :{  Then Tim told me that they would need to try to get approval from the Board to hire two receptionists, since they didn't know if it was in the budget.  (I thought that was strange, since Tim told me in the beginning that they would definitely be hiring two receptionists; one to work half of the week, and the other to work the other half.  But whatever).

Lisa gave me a bunch of employment papers to take home with me and sign, and she also explained to me that I would need to go to this certain clinic in town to be drug tested (a urine test, where they would need to actually personally witness me peeing into a cup), and that I would also need to go to the police department and get them to do a background check on me for $10 -- at my own expense.  Not too big a deal, I figured.

At that point, Tim and Lisa began hem-hawwing around yet again, griping about how they had to go to a Board Meeting that evening, and how the Board Meetings last 'til 9:00 PM, and they're always worn out the next day.  Tim reminded Lisa that her brother was coming in from Texas to see her the next day.  And Tim told me that he and Lisa like to try to take a couple of days off a week, but that they hadn't been able to do that for a few weeks.

The next thing I knew, Tim said that their current receptionist, Kelli, had a doctor's (obstetrician) appointment the next day and wouldn't be there.  I asked Lisa if Kelli was simply going to be out on maternity leave, and they just needed to fill the receptionist position temporarily until she returned.  Lisa frowned, wrinkled her nose, and said hatefully, "I don't think so.  She said she was coming back, but I know her too well.  She won't be back".  Tim asked Kelli if she would come in either before her doctor's appointment or after it, but Kelli refused.  Kelli lives in the next town over, and she told Tim that "it wouldn't be worth it" for her to come in, and that the appointment was an important one for her baby, and she wasn't going to miss it.  And since Tim and Lisa were dead-set on having the next day off to recuperate after having to go to that Board Meeting, they told me to come in the next day!  To run it all by myself!  With no training!  And nobody in the whole building that would be able to help me!  :O

I was shocked.  Lisa told me that when a customer came in, for me to "lie to them" and tell them that "the computer is down", and hand-write them a receipt.  And Tim told me that if anybody came in wanting to adopt an animal, that I would just have to turn them away and tell them to come back on Saturday; that I was new and didn't know what to do!!!  Lisa told me that I could just wait 'til next week to get the drug screening and background check.  Lisa and Tim asked me if I would do it, and I shyly said "I guess...it will be a trial by fire"!  Lisa showed me where the "Standard Operating Procedures" manual was, gave me the nickel tour of the facility, a "STAFF" t-shirt to wear, and half-heartedly apologized for "throwing me to the wolves".  I sadly, jokingly told them that I would just make sure the building didn't burn down, and then I finally schlepped out the door.

In just a few days, I went from thinking that I would be working Mondays through Thursdays with some Saturdays, to being told that I would need to come in just on Saturdays for a while to learn the protocol, to being told that I could just come in as a "substitute" whenever someone needed to be out, to being suddenly told to come in the very next day since nobody would be there -- even though I had no real training and wouldn't be able to do a thing!

In shock, I drove home upset all the way.  By nature, I'm not comfortable in the least being immediately shoved into doing something that I don't really know how to do; it sets off my anxiety big time.  I take medication to help keep my anxiety pretty much under control for the most part, but nothing can take it away altogether.  I worried about it and worried about it, and eventually I got a phone call later that evening from Tim.  He told me that Lisa would be able to enjoy her day off so much more if she knew that I wasn't there the next day trying to handle it all by myself.  Tim told me that the other girl that had applied that they had liked, Tina, had had a day or two more "training" than I had (training?  I don't remember having any "training", and what might have been misconstrued as "training", Lisa told me not to pay attention to, since in the end, she would show me the way she wanted things done)!  So Tina might know how to do some things, and then I could serve as the "common sense".  I told Tim that it would make me feel better to have Tina there with me too, and we hung up.

But I didn't really feel better about it.  By this time, everything had been such a whirlwind, everything had constantly changed on a dime, and both Tim and Lisa had been ultra-flaky and super-wishy-washy from the get-go.  I got a very bad vibe from it all, and felt like they were quickly attempting to make me their doormat/slave.  And it appeared as if Lisa was incapable of ever being satisfied with the way that anybody did anything!  I figured that if this is the way they were going to jerk me around when I hadn't even been completely formally hired yet, then what else would they possibly try to do to me?  SHEESH!  So I thought about it and thought about it, and finally came to the conclusion that a little part-time minimum-wage job wasn't worth all the extreme aggravation from Tim and Lisa.  So I wrote a letter to Tim and Lisa explaining that the job was a little more stressful than I had anticipated (which was not completely the truth), and also said that I thought my focus should remain on being a stay-at-home mom for the time being (again, not completely the truth), and thanked them for the opportunity (just to be nice, because that's how I am).

The next morning, I went up to the Humane Society, met Tina, and told her my decision.  She was very young, pretty, and seemed extremely nice.  She told me that she understood, and she didn't blame me for wanting to keep being a stay-at-home mom.  I put my letter to Tim and Lisa in Tim's box, and left, relieved.

I expected to get a phone call from Tim sometime that day, but he didn't call me until early the next afternoon.  I purposely let it go to voice mail, and he said on the message that he had to "pick himself up off the floor"; that the job did have a little bit of stress, but that if I had the option to  be a stay-at-home mom, then he understood.  Then he asked me to return the t-shirt that Lisa had given to me.

Damn.

So much for that.  Well, I guess at least I tried.  :/

SHUT UP ALREADY, CROWS!

Uhh!

Since very early this morning, there have been a flock of crows around the house that WILL. NOT. SHUT. UP.  Especially this one crow in particular.

I wish I knew what they were saying.  It's just CAW CAW CAW MAAAAHHH CAW MAAAH CAW CAW CAW MAAAHHH CAW CAW CAW CAAAAWWWWW BLEHHHHH
...non-stop for hours on end!!!

I swear it sounds like someone flung a bunch of kazoos into a wind tunnel!  Uhh!!!  It's driving me nuts!!!

Really, crows?  Must you really caw non-stop at the top of your lungs for 7 hours straight?!?  WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?

Then it dawns on me that a group of crows is actually called a "Murder".  NOW I KNOW WHY.

SHUT UP, CROW!  Sic 'em, dogs!  Get 'em outta here!  >:{

(play video through a giant stack of speakers all set to maximum volume non-stop for 8 hours for real-life effect)

Hair Help

A little while ago, Lilly came trotting up to me and said "NEED SOME HELP"!  This is what the problem was:

It took me a minute of wrangling, but I finally managed to get it out.

How do things like this even happen?

When you've got a wacky young'un, expect the unexpected.  Constantly.

LOL!  *sigh* 

Once again, a mommy's work is never done...!  ;D

The Bunny's Arch Nemesis: The Broom

The bunny HATES the broom.  It growls at it, lunges at it, and even boxes it.  It's the cutest little hatred you've ever seen!  :D

Bunny Funnies!

A little while ago, Lilly came running to the bedroom where I was at and told me "COME SEE WHAT I DID TO THE BUNNY...HURRY, IT'S CUTE"!!!

So I hurried to the living room with her, only to discover this:

Lilly had shoved an empty toilet paper roll down onto the bunny's ears, like a bad ponytail/hat.  LOLOLOLOL!!!  Poor bun!  I had to take a few pictures before I made her take it off, though!  Ha ha ha ha ha!!!  :D

Jamie's Garbage Truck Adventure!

On our way home from the beach yesterday, Jamie realized that his garbage truck was still full of garbage, and that it needed to be emptied (the truck had run out of gas before he had a chance to dump it on Friday).  So instead of having to mess with it on Monday morning, he opted to just go ahead and take care of it this weekend, to make his Monday run smoother.

Me and Lilly had never really witnessed Jamie doing his job before, so I decided to take the opportunity to video the adventure!:

Dog Disasters

Lucky Snagged on a Rug:

We've had some trouble with our dogs lately.  Our radio fence malfunctioned several weeks ago, so we decided to just unplug it and try to do without it and see how that would work.  Heh.  It went OK for days, but then the dogs eventually figured out that it wouldn't zap them anymore if they got close to the line.  Lucky is good and stays at home, but Maddie is a different story.  

Yesterday, me and Lilly spent the day over at my brother & sister-in-law's house, babysitting my little almost-3-year-old niece Claire, who lives across the road from us.  At one point, we went outside the house and sat on the front porch for a little while to play the ever-rousing, grandma-endorsed game of "Guess the Color of the Car That Will Go By Next".  Well, Maddie and Lucky, who were still across the street at home, heard our voices and started barking and whining, desperate to join us.

The day went on; we eventually went back in the house and had lunch.  Then we played a little while longer, and the next thing I knew, as little Claire was running by one of the living room windows, she sees something outside, stops, looks, points, and says "Who's that dog?"  I got up and looked, and there was Lucky, running down the highway, a truck creeping behind her and honking.  I flew outside to see Lucky run off down the side of the road...chasing after Maddie, who was charging off through the woods to go down to the lake to go swimming.  Uhh!

So we all went out on the porch and called and called for them.  Of course they wouldn't come right away, since they were having too much fun running amok.  A little while later, we noticed both Maddie and Lucky trotting around the yard outside the house panting, and I called them to come up on the porch.  I was hoping they would just stay put and lay down and be good, but then a truck went by, and Maddie, being a dopey uncontrollable Boxer, charged after it.  In all, I witnessed the dogs almost get run over two or three times.

Well, that tore it.  I knew that the only way I could make sure that they wouldn't get run over would be to put them in the house.  Luckily, my brother & sister-in-law's house (which was actually mine & my brother's grandma's old house) has an enclosed "back porch", which houses the washer, dryer, chest freezer, etc.  It's where they keep their own dog, Stella, every night to sleep.

So I wrangled my two galoot dogs into the enclosed back porch so I could make sure they would be safe.  However, I knew better than to leave them alone closed up back there, because Step 1 - They wouldn't shut up whining their @$$es off, wanting to be with me, and Step 2 - if I did leave them alone closed up back there, they would chew up and completely destroy everything they could get their mouths on.  So in addition to babysitting both Lilly and Claire, I also ended up having to dog-sit.  Closely.  Thankfully, at that point in time, both Lilly and Claire had just started napping (which was a completely miraculous thing for Lilly to do), so the babysitting gods must have been smiling down on me.

I scooted a chair from the dining room table onto the back porch where the dogs were, had a seat, and texted Jamie "WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO BE HOME?!?", explained to him about the dogs, and told him to "COME GET THEM!!!"

Fortunately, I didn't have to wait too terribly long before Jamie came rolling in.  Of course he conveniently used my car to take the messy, stinky dogs home in, instead of his truck.  >:/  But at least he got them home and put up in their pen so they couldn't escape again.  Crisis averted.

Until today.

Me and Lilly were walking down the driveway on our way to the trampoline.  Lucky was standing down in the yard next to the road, anxiously looking toward the woods.  Maddie was nowhere to be seen.  So I knew what had happened.  The next thing I know, Lucky took off through the woods, obviously after Maddie, who had ran away again to go swimming down at the lake.

So here we go again.  I tried to coax Lucky back up to our house and into the dog pen, but she refused to go because she knew that Maddie was still on the lam.  All silly Lucky would do was just lay flat on her back with her feet sticking up in the air.  So we had to get the leash, but even that wouldn't work.  Jamie ended up having to carry Lucky, the 55 to 60-pound dog up to her pen.

Then we had to go get Maddie.  I had seen her trotting down the highway.  I stayed at the trampoline and continued to call for Maddie, while Jamie got in his truck and drove down the highway, looking for her.  It didn't take long before he found her.  Maddie had heard his truck and came running up to him from her impromptu swim down at the lake.  Of course, Jamie didn't want to haul her wet, stinky @$$ home in his *precious* truck, so I had to walk down the highway, meet them in the middle, and then I had to walk Maddie back home on her leash.  >:{

This whole time that we were trying to wrangle up Maddie, Lucky was locked in the dog pen at home, howling and bellowing her heart out.  I've never heard the like in my life.  Lucky loves Maddie so much, and has to be with her constantly.  And if Lucky knows that Maddie isn't on the premises, Lucky will pitch one heck of a fit and basically cry-howl at the top of her lungs until she gets reunited with Maddie.

Sheesh.

So we got Maddie put safely into the dog pen with Lucky, and put a plastic kiddie pool in there filled with fresh water so Maddie could lay in it (Lucky is terrified of water, and hates it, ever since she fell off a log and splashed down into a stream when she was a puppy).

All I know is that I think that these two will be the last dogs that I will ever have.  They're cute and funny sometimes, but they're a LOT of trouble!

Whew!  :P

Even More Tales From The Beach - Chester the Molester Edition :P

Well, yuck.  :P

Late yesterday afternoon, Lilly was bored (as usual), and begged me to take her to the beach.  We actually hadn't been to the beach in quite some time since it's been so rainy lately, so I figured why not.  So even though it was around 5:00 PM, I took her anyway.

When we got there, a bunch of old-car enthusiasts were having some kind of shindig. I'm talking old cars like the ones that have those "ah-oo-ga" horns.  Like these:

Anyway, there were a whole bunch of old cars like this parked near the pavilion, and the old-car people were having a massive cookout (man, it smelled delicious).

So I flung my blanket down on the shore, had a seat, and commenced to watching Lilly frolic in the water.

There are a pair of ducks who usually come up on shore from time to time, and if I have anything in the cooler to feed them, I like to fling them some food (like bread or crackers; something they would be able to eat).  Lo and behold, eventually the female duck came up on shore.  So I tore some of the bread off of Lilly's sandwich that I had packed for her, and began tearing it into smaller pieces and throwing it to the duck, which had waddled up to just about 2 feet in front of me.  I was having a nice time feeding the duck, when out of the corner of my eye, I saw a man approach me.  He looked like he was somewhere in his 50s.  I thought that surely he was going to just walk past me, but I saw that he was heading straight for me, and then he loudly said to me something to the effect of "Don't feed that duck, honey; some of us need that more than it does"!  I didn't know what to do or say.  Then he came right up to me, grabbed my shoulder, and asked "What are you feeding it"?  I sheepishly said "Bread...".  The way he was acting, I thought that he was going to get on to me for feeding it something "unnatural" or "unhealthy".  But no.  The creepy man didn't hear me (and it was hard for me to hear him too, since the old-car-shindig people were running some kind of generator or something that was making a heck of a racket almost the entire time they were there).  So the creepy man yelled "HUH?"  And I repeated myself "Bread..."  And the creeper yelled "WHAT KIND OF BREAD?"  To which I replied "White bread...".  And then he took the bread from me, tore off a piece, and I assumed that he was going to toss it to the duck, but no.  HE FREAKING ATE IT.  HE FREAKING ATE IT HIMSELF!!!  WHAT THE %$&$#?!?!?  Then as the weirdo was backing away from me, he said something like "Ahh, I needed that...it's been a long day"!

Well it kind of pissed me off and freaked me the hell out, but I'm too scared/nice to say anything to anybody when something weird like that happens, so I just continued to sit down on my beach blanket and whisper to myself "Oh my GAH, what the hellllllllll"?!?!?

Fortunately, the creeper went back to his folding chair, which was unfortunately positioned nearby, and continued to try to talk to me.  Over the racket of the generator(?) he hollered "DO YOU HAVE A CAR"?  And I shook my head no.  (I knew that he was talking about one of the old cars).  And then he re-stated what he meant "DO YOU HAVE ONE OF THOSE OLD CARS"?  And again, I shook my head no.  I was so freaked out, I just wanted him to go away.  I considered jerking Lilly out of the water and going home, but I knew Lilly would pitch a fit (even if I was about to get kidnapped and murdered; she'd still want to have her fill of getting to go swimming).  And I figured I was pretty safe since there were tons of other people around anyway.

Then the weird, creepy man took off down to the lake and began swimming.  He was all over the place, bobbing around all fast and weird.  I secretly watched him (covertly hidden behind my sunglasses, of course), and saw that he was kind of creeping out a few other women in the water with their children, too.  Bleh!

Eventually the weirdo man got out of the water and went back to his folding chair nearby.  I thought he would leave me alone, but a little while later, he yelled something else at me.  That stupid generator(?) was still running, so I couldn't hear well.  I could only make out part of the tail-end of what he had said, which was something about "eat some meat".  So I looked over at him to try to see what he was saying.  The duck was still nearby me in the edge of the water.  I thought that the creepy man had meant that the people having the cookout needed to throw the duck some meat.  So, confused, I pointed at the duck and yelled back to him "I DON'T THINK IT'S A CARNIVORE".  And he laughed, and yelled "NO; I WAS TALKING ABOUT ME; I'M A CARNIVORE".  So apparently the creepy weird man had originally stated something to the effect of wanting to eat some meat (I'm assuming since the people's cookout smelled so good).  And since I'm an idiot, I hollered back "GOOD, I AM TOO"!

By this time, I was feeling like an ass and wishing the guy would just hush.  He didn't.  Then he yelled to me something like how he could go for a hamburger, and I think he even added "wanna join me".  I couldn't really hear, and stupidly yelled back "THAT SOUNDS GOOD" just to try to be nice and make small-talk.  Mistake.  I guess he was secretly trying to come on to me or something, and thought I was taking the bait!  He excitedly asked "WHAT DID YOU SAY"?  And me, suddenly realizing that he mistakenly thought I was "into" him, just quietly shrugged.  Then I laid down flat on my beach blanket and looked up at the clouds, thinking OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD WHAT A DUMBASS to myself for a long time.

Eventually the weirdo creeper man went back into the water and bobbed around all over the place a million miles an hour, while I just continued to stay on my blanket, wanting to die.  It was at this time that I noticed something even more bizarre about this man (as if it couldn't get any weirder).  Next to his folding chair, he had a bucket.  No big deal, right?  Buckets are a common thing found on beaches, right?  WRONG.  NOT THIS KIND OF BUCKET.  No joke, this is what he was carrying his small stuff (like socks) in:

A FREAKING EMPTY OLD PAINT BUCKET.

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!?!?!?

So after the weirdo creeper finished bob-bob-bobbing along in the water, he went back to his seat on the beach, and thank GOD began getting ready to leave.  FINALLY.

I figured that would be the end of his weirdness, but he had to leave me with one parting shot -- he yelled to me something like "SEE YA LATER, CARNIVORE...THANKS FOR THE BREAD"!  And all I could do was just smile, nod, wave, and give a thumbs-up.  AW, GAH, SOMEBODY JUST KILL ME!!!  WHY?!?  WHY ME?!?  UHH!!!!!!

Well, at least I managed to somehow refrain from getting kidnapped once again.  Freakin' creepy weirdo!

I wish I had a cloak of invisibility.

UHH!!!  >:P