January 19, 2014

Deana Goes Shoppin'

Well, since I go to work in the school lunchroom the day after tomorrow (and since I don't already have any suitable clothes to wear to the lunchroom that don't make me look --and feel-- like a schlub), I decided to go to Wally World to pick out a few new things.

The ladies that work in the lunchroom all wear scrubs.  So I decided to just go ahead and get myself at least one or two outfits to start out with.  Wearing scrubs will be a damn sight better than having to dress up every day like I had to do back when I worked at the stupid bank!  That's another thing about the bank that I hated!

Anyway, I've never tried on a pair of scrubs before, so I wasn't really sure what size to get.  Upon looking at them, they all appeared to run fairly large (for comfort and ease of movement, I suppose).  So I figured I would probably need a Small or an Extra Small.  They didn't have a whole lot of "cute" ones to choose from.  At first, I grabbed a scrub-shirt with cartoon owls on it, but I eventually put it back because I came to my senses.  I also briefly considered a scrub-shirt with some weirdo pattern, but it was too old-lady-ish.  Finally I realized that I would probably be better off to just get solid colors; that's more my style anyway.

They didn't have a whole lot of Smalls or Extra-Smalls to choose from, so I grabbed one of each small size in purple (for the shirts), and one of each small size in black (for the pants).  Luckily, I saw a pair of extra-small scrub-pants that were actually petite-length, so I grabbed those really fast.

And just in case I were to need a thin, long-sleeved shirt to go under the scrub-shirt, I found a gray one in the athletic-wear section (they didn't have white).

So onward I went to the fitting rooms to see if any of the stuff fit.

First I accidentally tried to go into a Men's dressing room, but then the guy running the fitting room let me into one of the Women's dressing rooms right next to it.  I don't know why it really matters.  It's not like the Men's dressing room has a urinal in it, and the Women's dressing room has a tampon machine on the wall or anything, LOL.

Anyway, I got in the Women's dressing room and stripped off.  I decided to start with the size Small scrub-shirts and pants.  First, the pants.  The Small size pants I grabbed off the rack were not petite-length, so of course the legs went down past the ends of my toes.  And they were too baggy.  So I frowned and ripped them back off.

I tried the Extra-Small petite-length scrub-pants next, and they fit great!  I was happy and relieved!

So keeping the pants on, then I moved on to the shirts.  First, I tried on the gray long-sleeved shirt that I planned on wearing under the scrub-shirt if I needed to.  I don't know if I'll need it or not; I'm not sure how hot the kitchen in the lunchroom gets, so I might not ever need it.  But, I am really cold-natured, so I thought I'd get one just in case.

It fit fine (for wearing under a scrub-shirt; but I probably wouldn't ever wear it all by itself), so I took it off and moved it to the "keep" pile.

Next, I tried on the Small scrub-shirt.  It was OK.  It seemed to feel just a little weird somehow.  I started to take it off so that I could try on the Extra-Small just to see what the difference was.  But I couldn't take the shirt off.

I pulled, I pushed.  I yanked, I tugged.  I tried not to have a panic attack while my head was still firmly hung inside of the shirt.  I weighed my options.  Should I yell for help?  Should I call 911?  Should I just remain calm and call Jamie (who was at home) to come save me in the fitting room?

Finally, I took a deep breath and told myself that I could do it.  And with a mixture of jumping and very specific tugging and pulling, I managed to get the shirt off!  WHEW!!!

I made a funny face and laughed to myself in the fitting-room mirror.  It's not that the shirt was too small and tight; it's just that scrubs are made from a cotton/polyester material that doesn't "give".  It doesn't have any stretch to it whatsoever, and you have to pull it off and on over your head.  There's no zippers or buttons.  It's easy to get on, but damn near impossible to get off!  Like one of those mouse traps where the mouse can go in, but can't back out!  LOL!  And that's just how I felt -- trapped like a rat!  I was the rat, and the shirt was the trap!

After that fiasco with the size Small shirt, I really wondered if I should push my luck and even try the EXTRA-Small shirt!  They'd probably have to call the fire department and dispatch the jaws of life to get me out of that one!  But I got brave and figured if I was able to manage to wriggle out of the size Small, then surely I could wriggle out of the size Extra-Small.

So I pulled on the Extra-Small, and amazingly, it fit even better than the size Small fit!  Apparently even though it was made by the same company, it must have been a slightly different cut (and it had a tie in the back whereas the first one I tried did not).  I was slightly confused at the surprising difference, but amazed and happy.

Then I decided that I should probably try the gray long-sleeved shirt underneath the scrub-shirt to make sure it would work.  So I did, and stood back to admire myself in the full-length fitting-room mirror.  I looked so cute!  I secretly pretended to be a nurse for a few seconds.  It felt good to know that I'll be working soon, hopefully doing something that I'll enjoy.  And somehow wearing uniform-type clothing makes me feel like I have a purpose and that I know what I'm doing.  It somehow gives me confidence and maybe even a little bit of pride, which is something that I never really felt much of back when I worked at the bank.

I hope this lunchroom job works out; I really expect for it to.  I'm looking forward to it, and I think it will be fun!

So anyway, I got dressed back into my regular clothes, and took the Size Small shirt and pants back to the rack.  Now knowing that the Extra-Smalls are the ones I needed, I grabbed one more scrub-shirt (this one, a lime-green) just to have another one on hand.  So now I have the under-shirt (if I need it), 2 scrub-shirts, and 1 pair of scrub-pants just to start with.  I'll get more stuff as I need it.

Next up on the shopping list...work shoes!  So I walked over to the Shoe Department and started looking.  I looked briefly at all the different kinds of shoes, but I figured that I should probably look for those kinda ugly "industrial" ones that are specifically made for work.  Behold!  I spotted the "Great For Restaurant Work" non-slip shoe section, and began trying on.  The first ones were actually kind of cute; they looked a little like Mary Janes.  I tried them on, and my socks looked ridiculous peeking out of the tops, so I put those back.  Next I got a different-looking pair off the shelf.  I tried them on and walked around, and they felt OK, but my socks made them feel a little bit rough and slightly tight.  There was one more clunky style (that had shoelaces that you had to tie), and even though I didn't like them, I tried them on anyway.  Even if they looked like dog terds but felt like walking on a cloud, of course I would get them, because it's all a matter of comfort and function.

I must admit, though, that after trying them on, I was secretly glad that they didn't feel like walking on clouds.  Compared to the ones I tried right before them, they were heavier, hit right below the ankles, and they were kind of clunky, and I didn't really like the fact that they had shoelaces that might come untied.  So I re-tried on the other ones just to be sure, and even though they felt a little rough, I believe it's the crappy pair of socks I have on that were making them feel that way.  All of my soft socks were in the dirty laundry hamper today, so I had to wear this stupid pair of ill-fitting crunchy dress socks that won't stay up.  I think that if I wear those shoes with my normal soft cotton socks, they'll feel good.

So I went to the checkout, left, and then went to Home Depot.  Our stupid house insurance company sent us a letter several weeks ago notifying us that they weren't going to renew our policy (because they're no longer going to be insuring homes in our rural area) --again-- this is the second insurance company that's done this to us in the past few years.  But it's OK, because our insurance agent is getting us insurance coverage through a different company for both our vehicles and house, and it will end up being around $300 cheaper than what we were paying.  So that's a plus.  The only downside is that the new insurance company will send out an inspector to look at the exterior of our house, so we're going to have to make sure that everything is up to snuff.  I mean, we don't have any tree limbs laying on the roof, and we don't have piles of trash laying around, but we were lazy and never got around to pressure-washing the house last year, and we never have totally taken proper care of removing the fallen leaves around the house from this past Fall.  Lilly's sandbox is also chock-full of rusty ol' junk & corroded old toys that we need to trash.  We've got some clutter in the garage and on the porch that we need to get rid of (a/k/a hide in the crawlspace under the house --thank God they don't look there-- ha ha)!  Oh, yeah, and we have to temporarily disassemble and hide the trampoline.  Because no insurance company will insure you if you have a trampoline.

Anyway, I got off track.  The main reason I needed to go to Home Depot was to get a roll of screening for the back screen door that goes out into the garage.  The clods I live with (Jamie and Lilly) are barbarians who basically ball up their fists and punch their way through the screen door every single time they go in or out.  So both the top and bottom screens in the door are ripped out and have been flapping in the breeze for months now.  Jamie *tried* to fix it with 3 strategically-placed strips of gift-wrap tape, but that was idiotic and of course didn't work.  So it's left up to me to fix properly, since Jamie is a brainless caveman.  (Actually, that's giving cavemen a bad name.  Even they knew how to use simple tools)...  >:/

I got off track again.  While I was at Home Depot, I also needed to pick up a pack of replacement rubber tips for doorstops, because the one at our back door finally rotted and fell off.  Plus I've hit it with the vacuum, broom, and steam-mop, etc. and knocked it off so many times that it wore out anyway.  Well, it's been on there since we finished the house back in 2000, so almost 14 years is probably a pretty good lifespan for a cheap little rubber doorstop tip.  I went to Home Depot probably back last Spring to get a replacement pack of those things, but they were sold out.  I was so pissed and haven't been back to look for them again 'til now.  I looked and looked for them in Home Depot today, and finally eventually found them.  It helped that I'd looked for them before, so I knew about what aisle they were in.

Next on my Home Depot list was one of those little plastic things that you can put on your heat vent register that deflects the heat to go where you want it to go.  I don't actually need it to deflect heat; but I thought I could get one to prevent the bunny's poo-pebbles (and kibble, litter, and hay) from going down the vent next to its pen.  I don't think much (if any) of it has gone down the vents yet, but if you can prevent it for just a couple of dollars, then why not.  We're keeping the bunny inside our house since it's Wintertime and really cold outside, but when it comes Springtime and gets warm enough again, we'll put her back out on the porch in her pen so she can enjoy the nice weather.  She really likes being outside.  And when she's out on the porch, we can easily just whisk her poo-pebbles, stray spilled kibble, litter, and hay off the porch so that it goes down into the flowerbed.  Easy peasy.

Well, I went up and down every *&^% aisle, over and over and over looking for that stupid plastic vent-deflector.  Finally an ol' guy in the 'orange vest' asked me if I was finding everything OK, and that's when I asked him where those things were.  He took me to the aisle, which I had went down previously, but since the *&^% things were on the very bottom shelf, I had overlooked them.  *&^%.

The last thing on my list was the roll of replacement screen-door screening.  I knew they had it because Dad had bought some there before, and I watched him replace the screen in the door at our old house several months ago.  I figured that stuff would have to be somewhere around the doors/windows department.  I looked, and looked and looked.  All of the 'orange-vests' were occupied with other customers, so I couldn't find one to ask.  I even looked in the door-hardware aisle.  I even asked another customer dude (he told me it was against the back wall, but it totally wasn't).  Eventually, I got pissed.  I must have scoured that *&^% store for about 15 minutes before I finally scouted out an 'orange-vest' in the power-tool aisle and asked him where the rolls of screening were.  He took me and showed me, and like I told the man, it was THE ONE AISLE THAT I HAD NOT GONE DOWN.  I thanked him, and he walked off.  About 30 seconds later, he came walking back and asked me if I needed any help figuring out what I needed.  I told him yes; that I'd never done this before.  At least I had enough sense to measure my screen door and write down how big the "holes" were that I needed to re-screen.  So the 'orange-vest' dude helped me quickly determine the size roll that I needed.  I thanked him again and told him that he probably saved me from about 15 minutes of standing there trying to figure out what I needed!  Then he asked me if I needed anything else, and I told him no; that I'd gotten everything that was on my list.  And away to the checkout I went.

Next up on the agenda, going to the grocery store.  I was already pretty tired out from my Wal-Mart and Home Depot fiascos, but I had to get groceries.  So I did, and it went off without a hitch.  I was glad, because by then I didn't really have the energy to deal with any more fiascos!  Well, there was one minor fiasco, but it turned out all right.

The  "Boh-Boh-Boh, Boh-Boh Ba-Ran"♪  bagboy bagged my groceries again.  No, he didn't sing "Barbara Ann", but he did neglect to double-bag some of my 1.5-liters of Dr. Pepper, and I didn't realize it until I was loading my groceries into the back of my car.  The bag quickly stretched and ripped open, sending a bottle of Dr. Pepper tumbling down onto the parking lot.  In the split-second that it happened, I yelled "SH*T"!!!  It fell and hit the pavement with such force that I just knew it would immediately explode.  But it didn't.  So I picked it back up and put it in the back of my car.  Then I just knew that it would explode in the back of the car on the way home from the grocery store, but miraculously, it didn't.  When I got home, I warned Jamie that one of the Dr. Peppers might explode, but it hasn't yet, so I think we'll get away with it without having a disaster this time around.  Whew!  Dr. Pepper crisis averted!

Anyway, while I was at the grocery store, I finally picked up some more hair dye (with good gray coverage) to touch-up with.  LOL, I might be a lunch lady, but I don't have to look like one!  ;)  LOLOL!!!  :D

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